Monday, December 6, 2010

Joe gets a Neti Pot

I don’t know why I’ve been cursed with chronic sinus issue. I didn’t kick dogs as a child. I didn’t do drugs as a teenager. I stopped pushing senior citizens out into traffic weeks ago.

It doesn’t seem fair.

Usually I just drug myself into oblivion when I have sinus issues. I really do sort of have myself convinced that Nyquil is the ALL purpose medication. I drink it straight from the bottle. I have no use for that little plastic cup they keep insisting shows me the correct dosage.

Now, the only problem with my Nyquil addiction is this pesky need to be alert and upright for the majority of the day. Despite my best efforts to persuade my employer, I cannot pass out in my office and still keep my job. So I need alternative remedies.

Over the counter medications do nothing. Literally, no relief. The doctor isn’t much help either because he just wants to prescribe me an $80 nasal spray that doesn’t do anything except deplete my Little Debbie fund.

And we all know that’s not ok.

So in desperation, I bought this:

The “Neti Pot.”

As disconcerted as I am about the entire process and by the fact that no real drugs are involved, I give the neti pot two nostrils up. I wouldn’t say I feel 100%, but it doesn’t hurt to be alive anymore. I’ll take it.

And next time I’ll make sure none of the dogs are with me in the bathroom while I’m doing it. It’s sort of awkward when they try to drink from the stream that’s flowing from one of your nostrils. And by awkward, I mean completely disgusting.

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